The E.W. Scripps Co., owner of the Knoxville News Sentinel, the Halls Shopper, and Powell Shopper, is in negotiations to buy Knoxpatch.com. “It is our philosophy to control all sources of news within a community,” said Mark Consuelo, a big executive-type at Scripps. “We feel that bringing each of Knoxpatch.com’s 6 readers into our fold…

In case Judge Alito is not confirmed to the Supreme Court, or if there is another conservative rebellion, President Bush has reportedly tapped Knoxville Judge Roald Van Wade as an alternate backup nominee. Judge Wade’s years of experience presiding over traffic court should provide him with an adequate resume to get confirmed. “Judge Wade has…

“The announcement that offensive coordinator Randy Sanders would step down was a move in the right direction, but only the tip of the iceberg when it comes to the fixes we’re putting into place.” stated an anonymous UT Official. “If we’ve learned anything from the success of the athletic program this year, it’s the benefits…

In response to fears of a terrorist attack involving characters from the popular South Park cartoon, a Towelie-ban has been initiated throughout the City of Knoxville effective immediately. According to reputable tips from anonymous sources that identified themselves only as Matt and Trey, a specific threat exists against the Downtown Knoxville trolley system and the…

The LCSD, which has been on a nightmare roller coaster ride for the last 14 months – beginning with the murder of Deputy Jason Scott – is scheduled to close its doors next week. Sheriff Tim Guider, who seemed exasperated, was quoted as saying, “I’ve had officers shot, officers shoot themselves, officers arrested, officers indicted….

Towelie ban put into effect in Karns

After setting up multiple temporary housing facilities to assist those impacted by recent hurricanes, the Volunteer spirit continues to shine in Knox County. Through a plan outlined by Mayor Ragsdale, every person in Knox County will be encouraged to take one bucket of fill-dirt to New Orleans and simply dump it out. According to the…

Planning got underway early in the year for a new Knoxville New Year’s Eve celebration. Grand ideas were put into action by a team determined to bring a little bit of New York City to downtown Knoxville, with Market Square filling in for Times Square. At the TVA Towers end of the Square, a ball…

Y-12 union nixes ‘4/10’ Plant re-evaluating plan already applied to salaried workers By FRANK MUNGER, munger@knews.com September 17, 2005 OAK RIDGE Union leaders have rejected a proposed “4/10” work schedule at the Y-12 nuclear weapons plant, raising questions about whether the entire program will be scrapped. Kenny Cook, president of the Atomic Trades and Labor…

Reports are coming in that a large portion of Knoxville has been all but destroyed by a rare inner-city brush fire. The cause of the blaze is unknown, but various individuals have been quick to point fingers and place blame. Rumors from the 4th and Gill Neighborhood point to the intense heat and friction created…

Now that we live out where Turkey Creek is actually convenient, we were delighted when plans got underway for a new Regal Cinema. Every Sunday morning as we did our Patriotic Duty© and shopped for groceries at the Wal-Mart Super Center (so sue me, they’re cheaper and have a better selection than anybody else, dang…

One Knoxville healthcare system has plans for coping with the 1000s of uninsured patients that are expected due to the changes in TennCare. “This hasn’t been announced to staff yet, so please keep the name of the healthcare system out of the story for now. Starting in October 2005, all uninsured patients are to report…

Due to an inventory error, Knoxville bookseller Books-A-Million temporarily had copies of the 16th book in the Harry Potter series on shelves last week. According to Bob Boulder, who was able to purchase a copy, take it home, and read it before anyone noticed, the story follows the troublesome foursome on various middle-aged hi-jinx as…

Knoxville had no need for another bar. Cha Cha is rather easy to access from West or Downtown, and Barley’s has every beer you’ll ever need (and a great pizza to go along with it). Then I heard about Sapphire. A place that was so sure of itself that it had no advertising and no…

After spending 6 hours working on the next version of Knoxpatch.com followed by a half hour spent drinking a 32oz beverage containing 12 ounces of coke and the rest consisting of Captain Morgan Private Stock and ice, Bjorn Knoxley attempted to write an article. It was not very good, but he did it anyway. He…