It’s more than just talk. Chattanooga is to be renamed ‘Chatlanta’, becoming a suburb of Atlanta, GA. It all began with plans for Chattanooga to house Atlanta’s second airport. Now Chatlanta will house all the waste disposal facilities for both areas and have agreed to keep all the homeless in the greater Chatlanta area, making…
Author: Ima Jeane Poole
Burger Giant Burger King tests new home delivery in Tennessee
Burger King is rolling out a new program for home delivery. “We have new technology that will keep your burger and fries warm while being delivered,” states the King. Folks are asking why Tennessee? “Tennessee has our largest target demographic, closest to our locations,” says the King, “With only a 10 mile delivery area, we…
Some want to change the starting age and requirements to enter kindergarten
In our ongoing effort to dumb down our children, state lawmakers have introduced legislation to change the cut-off date to enter kindergarten. Under current state law, the child has to turn five by September 30 in order to enter kindergarten. If passed, the new bill will introduce the following changes: The child must turn eight…
The Duggar family makes new announcement about baby #20
On the heels of The Duggar’s latest announcement, that Michelle is pregnant with baby #20, they have announced that it’s really babies number 20 – 27. She’s pregnant with octuplets. Plans to adopt triplets from China are in the works. The show is to be renamed ’19 kids and I quit counting’ will air this…
In another worthless survey, Knoxville named cleanest city in the US
Knoxvillians are proud to be named the cleanest city in the US based on an Alice.com tally on how much the average american spent per year on cleaning products. Too bad that many of the cleaning supplies that were purchased were used in the production of crystal meth. Does it still count if it’s cleaning…
Knoxville woman turns herself in to the KPD after watching new show ‘Person of Interest’
The 39 year old Knoxville woman turned herself in to the Knoxville Police Department after watching new show ‘Person of Interest’. The unnamed woman was quoted as saying, “I watched the show and new that I was in trouble. They were going to catch me anyway. I thought that they would go easier on me…
World Beard & Mustache Championship tainted by Latisse doping
The 2011 World Beard & Mustache Championships were brought to a hair raising halt. There was alleged Latisse doping from the United States Team, based in Knoxville. Officials noticed the telltale signs of Latisse doping in the Tennessee based team, such as discolored lips, thicker than normal beards and mustaches, and rotting teeth. “The use…
Professional shuffleboard comes to Knoxville, with the Knoxville Drift
Joining the recently announced Knoxville Nighthawks indoor football team is the Knoxville Drift. The Drift is part of the International Shuffleboard Association (ISA). The Drift will share the Knoxville Convention Center as their home arena with the Nighthawks, alternating nights. Shuffleboard has been growing in popularity with the increasing number of baby boomers. The low…
Knoxville Fire Fighters now fighting on another front
The threat of fire, smoke, and burning buildings is a cakewalk compared to the latest threat that faces local firefighters. While routinely investigating abandoned buildings for fire hazards, fire fighters encountered a tiny foe – fleas. It was not until they had exited the building that the tiny pests were noticed. “They were all over…
UT Knoxville dedicates new College of Pharmacy building
The University of Tennessee dedicated the new College of Pharmacy building, located at 4624 Rutledge Pike today. What was thought to be a Police escort for the UT President who was speaking at the event, was actually a drug bust. Turns out students were selling illegally brewed drugs out of the new building. When interviewed,…
Pigeon Forge going to all outdoor restaurants
Pigeon Forge City Commissioners voted last month to allow beer outside with the proper permits. This marks the first time that beer has been allowed to be served. With this new policy set in place, restaurants are moving to all outdoor seating. “We figure that the profits from the beer sales will make up for…
Knoxville smugglers foiled by Boomsday
A small boat was seen floating down the Tennessee River trying to dock near Calhoun’s on the River, during Boomsday 2011. When the men on the boat saw the crowds that had gathered to watch the fireworks, they immediately tried to go back upstream, tossing packages overboard. It is believed that the men were smuggling…
Local church and Moonshine Distillery team up with the Salvation Army
The most unlikely of trios is teaming up to fight the growing problem of the homeless in the downtown/old city area. “If you have ever walked through the Old City, you have more than likely been stopped and asked for money by a homeless person,” states John Baptist, “And you just know when they say…
UT Knoxville to open new ‘Road Kill Cafe’
In contrast to North Texas University’s decision to open a vegan cafeteria, the University of Tennessee, Knoxville campus has opened another non-traditional dining establishment, The Roadkill Cafe. Food service management pointed out that the vegan lifestyle is too expensive for Knoxville. The cafe will feature free roadkill from local highways and byways. By using roadkill,…
Sevierville PD using a new kind of officer
Due to massive budget cuts, the Sevierville Police Department has layed off more than half their staff. Due to the lack of officers, the Sevierville PD has adopted a new program to keep an eye out on those residents under house arrest. They are using bears. “People are so scared of them, that they stay…