In response to the US Presidential elections, the remaining modern Maya people have issued a collective statement on behalf of their elders. “Told you so, pack up your shit, get in a bunker, and take your guns with you. It’s over.”
Month: November 2012
Dewey defeats Truman
A simple reminder to all the press, bloggers, and opinionated people like myself. Nobody yet knows what is going to happen. If you haven’t voted, go do so.
Board and lumber sales spike among democrats as election nears
The media has given a great deal of attention to the spike in gun sales during the 2012 election cycle, but according to local retailers, other items have spiked as well. Just as the Republicans have rushed to purchase guns in fear of Obama’s gun-control policies, Democrats have purchased 2 x 4’s and 4 x…
Judge Baumgartner’s counsel responds to allegations of using other lawyer’s closing statements
As pointed out by the Knoxville News Sentinel, Don Bosch, Judge Baumgartner’s attorney, made liberal use of other trial lawyer’s closing statements this past week. When questioned about the lack of original verbiage in the proceedings, Bosch simply stated that, “If the glove doesn’t fit, you must acquit.” How this applies to the case at hand,…
Feral hamsters a growing concern in Lenoir City
In Lenoir City, feral hamsters are a growing problem that residents say must be dealt with. “It started in the 80’s, when the popularity of hamsters spiked,” states Lenoir City animal control representatives. “People would vacation in California and bring hamsters back with them, releasing them into the sewers as they tired of the little…